I have been blessed to have parents that have been happily married for the last 32 years and grandparents that were married for 65 years. Surrounded by friends and family who have been in successful long lasting relationships they are often where I draw inspiration for my blog posts and where I gather some of my advice from and this blog post isn’t any different!
Do you ever look at an older couple and think to yourself,
“ What’s their story, how did the end up here at this exact moment in time, have they been married for countless years, how did they keep their love alive all this time or did they just meet?”
I know I do and I often ask those couples how they do it and often ask my parents, friends and family alike what is the most important key to a happy, healthy and successful marriage and this was the answer!
You must be able to communicate openly and honestly with your partner through the good, the bad and the ugly! Simple enough, right? Not exactly it isn’t as simple as just saying how you feel and it being heard the way you meant it. There are certain tools that help the communication process with your significant other and helps strength your bond.
4 Tips To Better Communication
- Take the time and really think about your point of view. Don’t jump to any conclusions or harsh words but take a moment to realize what you feel and why you feel that way. Often times when we give ourselves time to think it through it allows the conversation to be just that and not turn into an argument.
- Take out the words never and always from your vocabulary. Although small words in size they pack a hefty punch. Think about it NEVER and ALWAYS. “ You NEVER listen,” “ You ALWAYS do that.” Sound familiar? How does it make you feel when your significant other uses those words towards you? Makes you probably feel a little combativ, “ I don’t ALWAYS do that,” “ Don’t say I NEVER do that, I did it last time.” They are strong and definitive words, try using other words like “often times I feel” or “sometimes I feel like I’m not …”
- Be open and honest with your feelings. If you aren’t than how is your partner supposed to know how you truly feel about him or a certain situation. They’re not a mind readers, let them know how you feel and don’t lie about something just because you think that’s what they want to hear. Remember honesty is always the best policy.
- Remember as much as you speak listen just the same. It is extremely important that you give your partner the same respect they are giving you. Listen to what they are saying and not what you just want to hear be open and understanding.
I know this is all easier said than done but that is the exact point it needs to be said. Be open, be honest and be communicative. Trust me you will be glad you did!
Do you agree?